Tuesday, February 20, 2007

Valentine Love


I found this in our local newspaper when they had the Valentine listings. When I saw this I thought, "Well he doesn't have a wife or a girlfriend, otherwise he'd be dead now, or at least badly wounded." Then on the next page there was a message from the same guy (I edited out his last name). This one said, "Sarah, 4 years with you is like 4 minutes. 4 minutes without you is like 4 years. Love, Billy." I was relieved that he hadn't forgotten his HUMAN love for Valentine's Day!!
***********************************

A man is stranded on a desert island, all alone for ten years. One day, he sees a speck in the horizon. He thinks to himself, "It's not a ship." The speck gets a little closer and he thinks, "It's not a boat." The speck gets even closer and he thinks, "It's not a raft."
Then, out of the surf comes this gorgeous blonde woman, wearing a wet suit and scuba gear. She comes up to the guy and she says, "How long has it been since you've had a cigarette?"
"Ten years!" he says.
She reaches over, unzips a waterproof pocket on her left sleeve and pulls out a pack of fresh cigarettes. He takes one, lights it, takes a long drag and says, "Man, oh man! Is that good!"
Then she asks, "How long has it been since you've had a drink of whiskey?"
He replies, "Ten years!"
She reaches over, unzips her waterproof pocket on the right, pulls out a flask and gives it to him. He takes a long swig and says, "Wow, that's fantastic!"
Then she starts unzipping this long zipper that runs down the front of her wet suit and she says to him, "And how long has it been since you've had some REAL fun?"
And the man replies, "My God! Don't tell me you've got a motorcycle in there!"

16 Comments:

Blogger SombraKnight said...

LOL! I like that! It was really funny!
Have a beautiful day and thank you for dropping by my blog! You are always welcome!

:-)

8:13 AM  
Blogger PEA said...

Ummmm...maybe his bike's name is Sarah???? lol Loved both the article and the joke! hehe Hope your day is a terrific one:-) Hugs xoxo

9:26 AM  
Blogger Kentucky Gal said...

too funny!!!
:-D

10:40 AM  
Blogger Diane J. said...

Two words: DEAD MAN. LOL! :-)

1:00 PM  
Blogger Susie said...

And who said romance was dead??
Loved the joke too!!
:)

1:13 PM  
Blogger Clara....in TN said...

Rachel, I was getting worried about you. Every day I have been to your blog and always the same one came up....OPEN YOUR EYES...which was written on Jan. 31st. Tonight, I saw where you had left a post on my blog and I went to check yours out again. Well, I finally scrolled down to the BOTTOM in the archives and found where you had been posting all along. I clicked on Feb. and now I am catching up on your posts! I have missed you.
Why does your latest post not come up when I go to your blog?
Did you get your crochet directions?

6:38 PM  
Blogger Abandoned in Pasadena said...

Loved the card and the joke.

8:10 PM  
Blogger Peter said...

Same joke must have at least 6 different endings... always funny.

6:41 AM  
Blogger Pretty Lady said...

Thank you so much for your lovely visit to my blog on my birthday! Thank you alot! peace and bliss

10:12 AM  
Blogger Raggedy said...

Cute card. I spose the first part was just to keep his guy card valid..lol
Hahahaha at the joke.
Thanks
Have a wonderful day!
*^_^
(=':'=) hugs
(")_ (")Š from
the Cool Raggedy one

1:54 PM  
Blogger Pawpaw said...

I rode today for the first time this year. Wonderful weather.

I'm so mellow right now, I'm ready to do another hundred miles.

2:35 PM  
Blogger DayByDay4-2Day said...

maybe his bikes name is Sarah???

4:27 PM  
Blogger FarmgirlCyn said...

Rachel, Your always so upbeat and full of life...that's what I like about you!

4:57 PM  
Blogger OldOldLady Of The Hills said...

LOL, LOL, LOL...That's a good one Rachel...And I wasn't expecting it...Maybe I should have been, but it's late and I am going to bed right after visiting you, my dear!

2:49 AM  
Blogger Cliff Morrow said...

My luck would have bee to have the paper to forget to put in the second ad.
Great story Rachel. Take care.

4:36 AM  
Blogger Jim said...

Hi Rachel -- How is the clutter busting coming along?
I hope you don't tell this, but Mrs. Jim rented me a storage place, 10 X 10 feet, to put my clutter in. It's too bad I sold my truck.

I think PEA is right, his bike is named Sarah.
..

10:03 AM  

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